Nelson Mandela 'Concert'

It's Nelson Mandela's 90th birthday soon and deservedly the British put on a gig tonight to celebrate the life of the former South African present and symbol for world peace and justice. Looking understandbly frail given the 18 years hard labour he served in a lime quarry whilst doing bird at Robben Island prison from 1972 for fighting the oppressive apartheid that strangled South Africa, it was with intrigue to me when the gig was announced as to who would be playing.

The usual 'do-good' element of Bono and Annie fucking Lennox were banded about by the media as well as a host of other top bands that could have led to something that would have dragged me away from Hollyoaks for the night and down to Hyde Park.

So for all Nelson's effort in fighting for democracy, overcoming the most formidable of all African regimes and almost dying for his just cause to going on to becoming an icon for global justice; what does he get for his birthday gig? Geri Halliwell, Simple 'we haven't had a hit since the 1980s' Minds, a Queen tribute band, a lung-fucked heroin hag, Johnny 'if it'll raise my profile i'll do it' Borrell' and yes, Annie 'fucking' Lennox. Poor old Nelson, he surely deserved better. When Halliwell turned up, a part of him must have wished he was back in Robben Island humping those limerocks about rather than having to suffer Old Spice. In fact he'd probably rather be indoors watching Max Cunningham's untimely demise on Hollyoaks with me over a glass of Kia Ora cordial and some Stagg Chilli before settling in for the soaps. Some may argue that all of the best acts are playing Glastonbury this weekend, robbing Nelson of a decent line-up. I doubt that very much. Looking at this year's 'forward thinking' line-up it's no surprise they couldn't shift the tickets for that either.